in the heat of the evening

this five o'clock sun is relentless
though its rays belong more to the horizon
than the sky it heats my skin quickly
yet I embrace it
a gentle breeze comes at even's cusp
tempering the dying solar flames
this ending mix of pleasure and pain
then I pause awhile
another day is over and I cannot retreat
I walked and talked with choices every hour
words and deeds I cannot erase nor relive
but I can pray
let this my evensong be as the night comes
I may grow and be tomorrow newer still
the mercies fresh with the rising sun
and I will glory
my soul is one day closer to my Maker
Who loves me past my understanding
He who makes all new will daily with me be
so I can hope

Goodbye, tree

Today outside my window a tree met an early death. Its sole crime was growing in such a way that the gate could not be opened inward, and vanity demanded that it do so. During its long life--for trees grow slowly upward and it must have taken years for it to reach such modest heights--it provided a lovely shade to the kitchen window. Mornings, when the fierce California sun beamed in through the east-facing panes, its small leaves tempered and softened the rays to make the kitchen cheery. In its absence, the sun blinds the hapless dishwasher standing at the sink exposed to the undeterred blaze.
My heart has a green tint, the result perhaps of formative years spent in western Oregon. The more trees, the better is my natural inclination and here in the dry valley so unlike the moist green land up north I shed a tear that one less tree stands to lend a modicum of relief to a sun-baked wanderer.

one ring at a time
steadily upward
you grew
defying gravity
and sandy soil
you clung
to nutrients
hard won
you fought
the long drought
and neighbor's scorn
you flourished
lending soft shade
to morning breakfast
you died
unthanked and unsung
relentless iron's victim

bulwarked

if I lay out the boundaries
my strong, impenetrable fortress
carefully baring every door
am I safe?

if my dwelling has the latest
cutting edge security system
even lasers and hair triggers
am I secure?

I can outline every safe zone
build walls that none can scale
but if my heart lies out there
I am at risk.

to what I give my heart
I will treasure without fail
and should that thief come knocking
I will open.

either I can lock my heart away
or give it to One whom I trust
no other option remains for me
to be unassailable.

sump

there is a hole in the ground
behind a house somewhere
its sides purposed and formed
I know not for what
the edges of its low walls
testify of intention past
jagged crowns missing something

into the shallow depths I gaze
a pond of rainwater hosts
decaying leaves and scum
small pinkeens dart around
the only life still moving

did once it please the eye
was it a well or fountain
made with loving hands
the center of this garden?

naught but a shadow remains
gathering dregs of days gone
and glory long forsaken

when the night falls

past the tree around the house
a light shines in my window
i pull the shades and close the blinds
and wonder at its brilliance
it shines so bravely in the dark
in the face of gathering gloom
as if for all the world to see
that naught can quench its glow
i turn from gazing on its shine
to contemplate its meaning
how when all seems so lost and drear
i can press still bravely on
another flips the switch that powers
i know it can but beam
and yet i too must draw my light
from Another's glory
so i lay my head down soft to sleep
the light shines ever on
and in my dreams i walk head high
down paths lit bright as day

dry rain

distant sounds
pulsing sirens ebbing
a baby's whimper
closer now
a chime
music played
by angel fingers
but above it all
my heart leaps
the rustle
whispers and sighs
i think drops
steady and strong
and then realization
dry rain
the false wind
dancing in spring
with dying trees
mocking hope
heat invasion
before the first full moon

Parallel Tracks

I know a baby whose eyes
hold steady as the trains
that whistle in the night
unsettling
what does he see
past the screen I constructed
to my very soul?
to really gaze in a person's eyes
to hold unswervingly
beyond a passing glance
vulnerability
letting go of what I expect
opening my heart to see
and be seen
I cannot see what he sees
I cannot know what he thinks
when excuses die upon the lips
I still myself to just be
to really look in another's eyes
the steady baby teaches me
the price of open windows
will I see love?
will you?